Letter to Laddu 26/4/2024- Part 2

 Hey Laddu 

I hope you got to spend quality time with M & Jr. i know you will be busy with week just like me in moving stuff around. Good luck with that. 

my experience when i was dating M and still having Chi Chi with P was really weird. i was with P but in my head i was imagining M. but not always i guess, i tried to shake it off most of the times. but yeah it was hard. But i didnt get into guilt that i am doing it to P. Me and M never discussed this part that, May be i told her once or twice that i have her in my mind. anyway at that time she was not serious about me. but i think almost 1 year i was doing it with P,i think until the Goa Trip. 

it is my mistake i should have warned you even more about this dilemma you may get into. but then i found that you are sorted in this matter the way you spoke to me then. i was also thinking ( pardon me, i know what you have for me is completely different and i am not judging you) you had did it with AC hence you can manage it without much conflict( I guess). Anyway i take the blame for putting you in such situation, i should have spoke to you more on this topic. Feeling you experiencing something which i also  struggled to pass through is bit painful for me too. i can relate to you but i am not able to do anything about it for now. 

i dont have any words to console you and make you feel alright. All i can do is pray for you to endure this phase and come out of this strong. may be this is the biggest consequence of the choice you made to have a connection outside M. you gain something but you may lost some part of you at the same time. 

i was not switching and all about work. i wanted to tell you about it when i saw Mayank's email in the afternoon but i couldnt find time to tell you that. Also I want to give a heads up that i need our help in advance cause sometimes you say that not informed earlier. i dont know just trying to let things told on time. i agree you were not in the mood to listen to it. but i just felt like saying . 

If you come to London now you have car to travel around. plan a trip soon . 

take it easy R my love my Laddu 

It is what it is

Hugs ( pyar wala) 

J