Letter to BM 10/4/2024
Hey B
Had another wonderful day with you and it went just like that
hmm.. few points to align B.. please dont get me wrong
one
Can I request you to drop the thought that there is some replacement/rebound approach which made you to connect with you. there could have been some funny discussion we had around it but I never believed it to be true. please.
Two
The Chi Chi intimacy we had, I was giving my approach to it. it was just something we wanted to experience hence we indulged but yes hate was the primary connection factor. Chi Chi is never and will not be a primary need in the long run and cannot be a constant engagement, as we are far apart(technically, sorry but we do share beautiful dirty minds which is cool too) . but yes I enjoyed it and would like to experience it again when possible. I am not attaching any guilt part to it for the liberty we are taking. I am just being super selfish here. please let me know if your approach or thought process around this.
Three
I understand the impact AC had on your life and why you still want to stay around . I can say now it is clear to me. I dont have any further questions on as I am clear on why you are doing what you are doing. peace out. i should not have said that I should punch him and all. My bad.
Four
I loved your response to my question on how you will experience me as a person or hater if we cannot get to meet ever. I am grateful for your attitude and willingness to hang around in anyway possible.
Five
Please stay always positive on our connection. Even if we miss each other or cannot talk I dont want to you to feel dull for a single moment. it is my humble request.
Six
I was not defending M on what he have done . I was just saying that it is quite natural. but yeah the kind of disconnect you experienced is not acceptable. you were saying that prompted your April engagement with AC which I understand that too. B you did what you did based on your best consciousness, thanks for sharing with me.But sometimes I find that you are justifying your actions, Please dont do it dear, I dont want to hear anything like that. i am not here to judge you ever..
All I want to say is I am just here to be with you on your journey forward. I do have my fears that ( as I told many times) I cannot be always around but I will stick around for sure.
I believe many of this stuff we were supposed to talk during our time together earlier. Glad we could do it today.
Thank you
hate you
J
Added later: I just miss you and looking for a chat from you.. may be It is the hangover of the long day with you.
posted by enjoyinlife at
12:05 PM
4 Comments:
Today J asked me tum bolo who i am...hmm who are you...u said v r friends...no we aren't just friends, v aren't officially together, then who r we.. secret haters? Just that...hmmm
I always thought what is soul mate
A Soulmate is someone that you have a very deep connection with. It is a union of the soul, mind, heart, and body at the highest level. Generally, we consider the Wife and Husband to be soulmates of each other.
Ok... generally husband and wife are soulmate they say...now is it true? In somecase it could be true...but in my case M never saw my naked soul (true R) ,wat i think in mind (007) , what's my heart longing (affection, romance the way i want) , my body( the desires, burning passionate flame in me) at highest level.... people think if bound in a relationship they know everything..no.. even what's M fantasies..what he feels, likes wants he might not say poora to be... may be in marriages we try to show our best part..i don't know...what ever it is .
Then comes AC he knows about me to some extent..i experienced all intimacy with him too like M...but again at highest level...? Ans is NO..
Ok only person who knows me at highest level in all intimacy, soul, mind, heart and body is my J.
Soul i showed u poora..mind also i exposed but heart and body expectations u just vibed...u hated and made love to me the way I wanted ( may be more than i expected) even without asking or knowing what i wanted u fulfilled it .U always made me feel special.
After thinking a lot the ans i got is 'u r my soulmate ' according to me. They say in life v encounter only 1 soul mate.. so i assume it's u..just like u i feel u filled all the gaps in me, accepted me as-is ..and it will always remain U ...u will be the 1st person i will look for whenever i want something ya wanna share something deep.
Now coming to ur question wat if u r not available at that moment...i ll look for u in blogpost, in google drive..i will wait for u... another question u asked wat if u had behaved like AC with me.. then i would ve showed some nakre, gussa with u as tum pe hakh jatana chahti hoon . . want u to come back and pamper me after saying sorry..but even if u didn't do all these i would ve still sticked to u as i want you... unless u throw me out of ur bus i will never go...
Then u asked me chi chi ka kuch diff dimension u have ..see not to explore i did chi chi with u ...i wanted to experience all intimacy with u ... enjoy the world with u...how it would be like having a guy like u in my life..but i got all intimacy in best and highest level with u..
U said its easy to show it in 4 days lifelong nahi...but J as a person v both r and the way v like to put efforts to make each other special v would do this whole life .. don't tell me u want to see this affection craziness after 2 years also...say wanna see after 15..20 also...bcoz ans is yes from my side...u ll see pagal R at her 50s too...
Now y next life..bcoz i want to experience more things with u ..i can do that only wen u r all mine and i m all urs... dating, traveling, cooking and feeding u... experiencing ur care when i m sick, ur pamper...also pamper u as much as i can....take care of u .. attend function parties with u ... handling finances together, making a home together many more things re... moreover see u every morning wen i wake up ....
U asked isn't it early to commit to this level and wish u for next life ..i 1st msged M on 3rd july, he saw me 1st time only once on 13th july...14th engagement was fixed, 27th july i was engaged...so if all these life-changing decision can happen with 10 days chat, 1 meet at home then with u it is very much possible right,? It's been 3 months chatting with u...1.5 months dating, 4 days stayed physically with u, experienced it..even after meet and chi chi i still feel the same butterflies seeing u, falling in hate again and again much deeper everytime then i can wish a lifetime based on it na...i know it's not just 4 days, throughout v both ll be the same...
By
Anonymous, at 3:33 PM
U asked me don't want M? See compared to the level of connect i had with him in past 10 years i have with u in past 3 months is much deeper in all aspects...also this life i hated M enough, experienced life with M, let me experience next life with u na..i know v don't ve next life so v r not missing the opportunity to experience it this life in all possible way..
Aaj acha laga i shares all SG pending talks with u, which i had decided will talk during next meet.
Why today then? Bcoz felt wen i see u next time I don't want D, M ya AC in between, those few in hours i get it should be only J.. wanna get lost in ur eyes body and arms..
Today u were in my world for a while while coming back from soccer, acha laga...also liked the way u got gussa on AC for scolding me, see the pain/discomfort in ur face reading the chats of AC ..it all shows wat i m to u re ..
Note: all these i told today from my perspective..u need not feel the same ..
Lot's of hate,
R
By
Anonymous, at 3:35 PM
Comment too long itseems 😂had to split
By
Anonymous, at 3:35 PM
You write and express well B .. thanks for sharing your thoughts .
By
Anonymous, at 6:45 PM
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