Letter to BM 18/4/2024

 Hey B 

Hmm.conversation with Mom was bit off. I dont know may be the drinks. I called and apologised else poor thing wont sleep well. its just that she said she is not ready mentally to accept M that bit put me off. May be it triggered that as if she is reminding me that I did a grave sin by walking away from P. I was not happy I walked away. I was selfish I agree. I just decided that I will be happy with M. I dont know why she cant let it go. still holding on to it. May be it is the way she is. 

I just wanted to give back to her and I said , yeah by the time when you are ready mentally I will bring another one. She didnt like it . 

Later I called her again and she said you are not a parent and hence you wont understand. I said, may be . 

I said sorry for what I said. 

I told my sis what happened and she was saying what is wrong with Amma. Jo was sorry that he shared the pic. 

I dont know in the evening they way you spoke to me also I was not able to understand, I know may be I pissed you off with the way I reacted when you told about pen. I intentionally dont want to make fun of you to hurt you. if anything of that sort I always warn you that ok I am gonna say something please dont mind. you were not accepting my apologies as well. I didnt quite understand what did I do wrong. about the tea too, you were getting upset on it ,I dont how to manage that conversation either. I dont know may be I need to improve on the way I communicate. you were upset that time I can see. Later you said you were just pretending, how do I know. I was just trying to make it up with you as much as I can. chodo, everything is fair in love and war. 

It was nice to meet Ra. but I think if the freind from Perth never told me then I would have never meet him cause he had jam packed schedule. anyways It was nice to meet him. we spoke a while and then I came back in a cycle. M called me in video while I was with Ra. she didnt expect it. She sent me a reel later with a theme "importance updating your patner" . bechari. I didnt tell her that I am meeting Ra. But I told while coming back that it was a pretty unplanned meet. 

BG checks are again required for this role. hmm, I hope it wont be a problem. let me try to complete all the documentation by tomorrow. dont want to delay it anymore. I just hope it will be just documentation checks. 

I really enjoyed your mug shot session today with the pallu. it was really entertaining. I dont know where you finding such energy. thank you. please keep it coming. looking at you was making it difficult to focus but I wanted to keep looking at you especially your back line. I was asking for side views cause I could enjoy both your mounts at the same time. I am glad to enjoy the valleys and mounts and plains and water fountains in you. today there as no scoring at our place looking forward to the next one sometime soon. count is 6 I believe now. I may go my place but I am tired and might sleep . 

you are indeed stubborn. Is it not possible to wait until next week after you recover to go look for things. is it not important to focus on recovery. I know you will be careful but why taking a chance. I am not being over caring and all . just being selfish that I want to meet you fully fit. 

will sleep now. 

Nyt Nt R 

hugs and hates 

J