Letter to B 19/4/24

 Hi B

Today was bit crazy day . This production issue was bit crazy. I got my CZen rejected . I was also trying to tell you about the fear or concern I got . I could not communicate that also properly. 

I did saw the comments you left yesterday night but I couldnt respond to those cause I was on call or other engagements. to be honest I was not aligned with the thought that blog will be a bidirectional medium for us to communicate ( means you will be updating your thoughts consistently, but I loved it) and hence I was hoping I will check later today while writing this. my bad dear. 

My concern is that I don’t know how things will be when I get there and I might loose you . What all reasons I can find to leave the place to come see you once  and Many more . 

But I just remembered something and I want to burry all that fears . you told me this before " Be your man"  . If I need to be your man I must be in fear . 

Just need to plan and execute those plans meticulously. Be on a mission which is to “ Be with R as much as possible it can be ( but with cautions) .

I am getting crazy with this BG check documentation, it is not accepting my details. I will try tomorrow again. 

I am getting flash of thoughts whether I need to go or stay here. had a same feeling when I went to dubai last time. dont think it is cause of you. Nope . I am just concerned about my PR status. 

I dont know I am not able to reflect and recollect even what happened earlier today. I admire your skills to remember things to day to the date to the even minute details. May be you experience each moment more intensely than I do and observer everything and recording it. 

loved your pics today . you looked good . Happy to see you again in the dress. I remember looking at your pics in WhatsApp status last year. from there to here , no way. I can only thank my stars. 

D called and was like . I dont know what to do, have to study something everyday. poor thing. 

I need to go write about a blue dress now . Need to stop 

I am gonna miss you re .. 

No hate but lot of hugs ( goose bump walk) 

J